Jolt Gum

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Jolt Gum Adopt a US unit for Jan 2015 - USS Frank Cable STS Funk from the USS Frank Cable wrote and we selected his team for the Jolt Gum adopt a unit program.   The Frank Cable's sole job is to fix submarines  - fast and...

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Jolt Gum congratulates the Red Sox!   Chew your way to your own championship!   The Red Sox bounced back from a 2012 season they'd rather forget by turning their won-loss record virtually...

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Be more creative. Add noise. Go Goldilocks on noise.  Get it just right and be more creative. It doesn't go to 11, but that noise does give me an idea.... In our never-ending (but occasionally...

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10,000 days of Jolt Cola Jolt Cola was the 1st energy drink sold pretty much anywhere.     Well, there was this also guy named Chaleo who started an energy drink in Thailand in the 1970's,...

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Jolt Energy Gum actually makes you smarter Caffeine all by itself increases alertness, focus, mental speed, and helps improve memory.  Chewing gum all by itself  increases alertness, focus, and most kinds of memory....

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Shape of… a Human. Feeling of…a Rhinoceros?

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For the love of animals..

 

We here at Jolt love animals.. A lot.. A lot lot.. Not too much, but a lot. Well, enough that we started thinking about what kind of animal chewing Jolt Energy Gum makes us feel like. After weeks of thought provoking chewing, we came to the following conclusion(s):

The bottle in the water cooler is STILL empty, but it’s no one’s fault.. Jeff.

Jolt Energy Gum makes us feel like rhinoceroses.   Rhinoceri?  Rhinos?  No, that sounds too much like a cold.  It must be rhinoceroses.

Rhinos love Jolt.  Or at least we thought we heard the zoologist say that.

Who’d have thought I could be so darn nimble?

Look at this monster. That is 3000lbs of unrestrained power.

Now, theoretically speaking of course, if a 3000lb rhino told you what to do.. You would do it. Would you rather be the rhino? Or the one being told what to do by the rhino? So we chewed another piece of Jolt Energy Gum. By this point, we felt like a rhinoceros outfitted with kr3-9J tactical armor (patent pending.) Full infrared scopes, heat seeking missiles.. Er.. I’ve said too much.

Disclaimer: Jolt Energy Gum will not turn you into a rhinoceros with kr3-9J tactical armor (patent pending.) If it does, keep it to yourself, we don’t need that kind of press. Beware of poachers.

-Joe

Posted on : 21-11-2014 | By : joe | In : Caffeine gum

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